4人搞笑英语简短话剧
『壹』 4人的英语短剧本
《赖皮孙子糊涂爷爷》英语话剧P: Pirate-Grandson. M: Mother. F: Father. K: King -Grandpa. 旁白: There are 4 members in a family, Pirate, a 7-year-old naughty boy. His mummy is a beautiful white-collar worker. His dad, Andy Lau is a famous singer, and his dear grandpa, King is a kindly old man. Pirate loves his grandpa most, because King is very spoiling him. He hates his parents. Frankly speaking, he is afraid of them, Because they are very strict with him. . 正剧：(P,K出场) P: Old King, Open the TV, I want to see Tom and Jerry. I love that mouse. Quick! No time! I can’t wait another second. K: Oh dear! I nearly forget it. Don’t worry, I open it right now. (作开电视状) P: Ha Ha! It’s really funny! Tom is so good! (作高兴状) Oh no! “The End!” Where is Tom? I hate the end! (摔电视机，作极度气愤状) Old King!? (对K吼) K：Oh, what a pity dog! (作左顾右盼状) Your parents are not here ,and we can change another one ,our brave Pirate, just tell me. I’m sure your demand will be satisfied. (作充满自信状) P：Really! OK! Now, let’s watch Caribbean Pirates! K: Humm, No, it’s unfit for you…… (作犹豫状) P: I just like this film, Old King, you tell lies. You don’t keep your promise.（作气愤欲泣状） K; Oh yes, I play it for you. (作为难状) But please be quite, I’m afraid your parents wound not like us doing these. P: Don’t tell so much! I have been an alt man of 7 years old. I promise it to you. (作自豪自信状) K：OK. (作舒心，安慰状) P: Fight him, kill him. Throw these bad guys into the sea…… (高声喊) K: Xu …….. (作禁声状). Remember your promise, young alt man. P: Oh? What promise? I have forgotten it. (作天经地义状) K: Oh?! You are right（作理解状，因为Pirate一贯如此，出尔反尔） P: Old King. I give you an honorable mission. (作自豪状) Be my horse, and I will ride on your back , let’s help these people in dangerous situation, just like a brave knight.(作勇敢状) K: What! Ride on my back! Be your horse!!(作惊异状) P: Yes, your hearing is very good, any question? (作若无其事状) K: No, No, sound a good idea! Very good! You are a brave Pirate. Now come on my back. (作无奈状) P: (作高兴状，作跃上马背状) Hei! Let’s go! Kill all those bad men. Quick! Run quick! ....... (意气风发状) （M,F携手进场）: P: Oh, my god! Mummy, Daddy! (A,D作慌忙状，挡在电视机前) M: Dad, what are you doing!? Naughty Pirate, isn’t your trick!? (作气愤状) P:（作阳痿状） Mummy, it’s not my fault. Old king let me massage his back. Hei Hei (作心虚状，以掩饰内心的恐惧) M: I don’t believe it. (作严肃状) Dad, isn’t really that? (询问K) K: Yes, of course, I can’t image a child only 5 year old, can massage so good. Oh……. (释然状，因为圆了我的谎) M: Really. I don’t believe the litter pirate can massage, who taught him. (作怀疑状) Dear, isn’t you ? F: No, I haven’t, but I decide to enjoy his massage another day, Do you think so, dear? M: Yes, really a good suggestion. （P，D作惊恐状。A：发抖，D：挥汗)（P挡着电视怕被M、F发现，K也为P作掩饰） P: Mummy, Do you feel a little cold? K: Yes, I can feel it. (边挥汗边说冷) M: No, it’s summer. Really hot, do you catch cold? P: No, No, just my feeling. (更加发抖，一不小心被B看到了电视) M: Pirate, what’s behind you? (疑问状) P: Oh, nothing, nothing! (作惊恐状) M: Move away .little Pirate! (作气愤状) P: Oh no! The storm will come. (捂脸作害怕状) M: Caribbean Pirate! What’s a bad film! Little Pirate!? (气愤状) P: Mummy, I surrender. (作投降状) M: Daddy ,this film is unfit for him , it is full of killing，force and negative passion, and it will let him become bad ! K: I know that, but I meat to let him watch Tom and Jerry and he like it very much. Yes? Pirate? (想转移话题与Pirate站在同一战线) P: Yes, a very clever mouse and a stupid cat. (作博学状) M: Dad, don’t let him watch so much TV, it wastes a lot of time, and it is bad for his eyesight. He may become short-sighted. (诚恳状) K: I know the disadvantage. But TV also teaches him a lot of things which he can’t learn from books, Such as survival ability and communication skills. (中气不足状，因为理由不充分) M: Just those force, fighting and cheat? (置疑状) P: Mummy, I apologize that I have cheated you. (诚恳状) I won’t do that next time. Can you forgive me this time, Mummy. (做鬼脸,逗妈妈开心) M: Pick up trick. It doesn’t work this time. (义正言辞状) P: Mummy, not next time, ok? ( 作悲伤状，以引起妈妈的同情) (M不理P) M: Dad. I know you love little pirate very much, but I think you should choose the right way. Spoiling is not true love. It’s the poison in honey. (作严肃状) F: Yes, Dad, Pirate has a lot of things to do. We should be his guide, not to carry out everything he said. We can bring him to the library to see what books attract him most. We can help him to develop his interest, shape his personality, and improve his intelligence and so on. I think it’s the right way to love our little Pirate. Do you think so, dear? (很理智，明晰状) M: It’s just what I want to say. (赞同状 ) F: Ok, I should change my way of loving him. I should let him do his own thing and be his guide. (作彻悟状) P: Oh, so much time has passed. I eager to go to wash room, I can’t bear it. (捂小腹，作难受状) K: Ok, I go to bring the paper, don’t worry! I’ll accompany with you. (作习惯性状，因为Pirate的大小便通常都由King主管) M、F：No, let him do that himself, and be his guide. (同声提醒K) K: Oh, yes, little Pirate, it’s your job now, nobody can help. You should do it yourself. (作揶揄状) P: Xi, I have been an alt man of 7 years old. I can do it. (跨进厕所，作藐视状，有什么大不了，不就进个厕所吗) M、F、K: Brave Pirate! (作自豪状，含有夸奖意) P: Oh, my god! The washroom is so large and dark! (害怕状，因为从末一个人进厕所) M、F、K: (All 晕倒)
Little Red Riding Hood 第一场:Little Red Riding Hood家 Mum: (妈妈拿着一个篮子,把桌子上的水果放在篮子里) Little Red Riding Hood:(唱着歌,欢快地跑回进来)Hi,mummy, what are you doing? Mum: (一边把答水果放在篮子里,心事重重地说)Grandma is ill. Here are some apples and bananas for Grandma. Take them to Grandma. Little Red Riding Hood:(边提起篮子,边点头说)Ok! Mum: (亲切地看着Little Red Riding Hood说) Be good. Be careful. Little Red Riding Hood: Yes ,mummy.Goodbye, mummy. Mum: Bye-bye. Darling. 第二场:在路上 (一阵轻快的音乐由远而近,Little Red Riding Hood挎着篮子蹦跳跳地跳到花草旁) Little Red Riding H
『叁』 求一部4人的搞笑英语话剧的剧本，最好带翻译
可以参考莎士比亚喜剧集
『肆』 幽默四人英语小短剧
小剧本-----小红帽
Little Red Riding Hood
第一场：Little Red Riding Hood家
Mum： (妈妈拿着一个篮子，把桌子上的水果放在篮子里）
Little Red Riding Hood:(唱着歌，欢快地跑进来）Hi,mummy, what are you doing?
Mum： （一边把水果放在篮子里，心事重重地说）Grandma is ill. Here are some apples and bananas for Grandma. Take them to Grandma.
Little Red Riding Hood：（边提起篮子，边点头说）Ok!
Mum： （亲切地看着Little Red Riding Hood说） Be good. Be careful.
Little Red Riding Hood： Yes ,mummy．Goodbye, mummy.
Mum： Bye-bye. Darling.
第二场：在路上
(一阵轻快的音乐由远而近，Little Red Riding Hood挎着篮子蹦跳跳地跳到花草旁)
Little Red Riding Hood： Wow！Flowers, how beautiful! （放下篮子采花）One flower ,two flowers, three flowers.
Wolf：（随着一阵低沉的音乐，Wolf大步地走上台）I am wolf. I am hungry. (做找东西状,东张西望) Here is a little red riding hood. Hi! Little Red Riding Hood. Where are you going? (做狡猾的样子和Little Red Riding Hood打招呼)
Little Red Riding Hood：(手摸辫子，天真地回答)To Grandma’s．Grandma is ill.
Wolf：（自言自语）I' ll eat Grandma. But……（对Little Red Riding Hood说）Hey, look! 6 little baby cks.
Little Red Riding Hood：(和6只鸭子随着音乐翩翩起舞)
Wolf：（悄悄地藏到大树后）
Little Red Riding Hood：（停止跳舞）Hello! Baby cks，how are you?
Six Ducks：We’ re fine．Thank you． Where are you going?
Little Red Riding Hood：To Grandma’s．Oh, I must go, bye.
Six Ducks：Goodbye．
第三场：Grandma家
Grandma： （喘着气出场，颤颤悠悠地走到床前，吃力地坐到床边，喘了几口，打几个哈欠，慢吞吞地躺倒在床上。）
Wolf：（从树后出来，边走边说）I am very hungry now. (做找寻的样子)Where is Grandma’ s house? (高兴地对观众说)Aha , it’s here.(敲门)Bang, Bang, Bang．
Grandma： Who is it？
Wolf：（装出Little Red Riding Hood的声音，一边得意地摇动尾巴，一边说）It’s me. Little Red Riding Hood.
Grandma： (边说边起床) Come in, come in.
Wolf：(得意洋洋地走到床边) Grandma , I’ll eat you.
Grandma： （惊慌失措地抓紧衣服，瞪着眼睛，边叫迫从床上滚到地上）
灰狼把外婆吞到了肚子里。
Wolf：（得意地拍拍肚子，翘起大拇指）Yummy！I’ll sleep.
Little Red Riding Hood：(高兴地敲门)Grandma．Grandma．
Wolf：(装扮成Grandma的声音) Who is it？
Little Red Riding Hood：It’s me。Little Red Riding Hood. What a strange noise!
Wolf：Come in， Come in.
Little Red Riding Hood：(蹦跳着进来，把篮子放在桌子上，走到床前一看，跳回几步)Oh! What are big ears!
Wolf：I can listen to your sweet voice.
Little Red Riding Hood：Wow! What a big eyes!
Wolf：I can see you pretty face.
Little Red Riding Hood：Oh! What a big hand.
Wolf：I can hug you.
Little Red Riding Hood：（跪在床前，拉起Wolf的手，边摸边说）Look! What a big hands?
Wolf：(从床上跳起来说)I can eat you!
Little Red Riding Hood：(拼命地跑)Oh！No! No!
Wolf：（追到Little Red Riding Hood，做吃状，拍拍肚子说）It’s delicious. I still sleep. I like sleeping.
Hunter： (一边拿着枪，一边做寻找状出场)Where’s the wolf? Look! A door．(推门)The wolf is sleeping.
Wolf：(发出呼呼的响声)
Hunter： (端起枪想打，又放下)What a big stomach! (摸摸Wolf的肚子)Grandma and Little Red Riding Hood are inside .I must be hurry．(从桌子上拿起剪刀，举起) Look! Scissors. (做剪Wolf的肚子)Cut, cut, cut.
Little Red Riding Hood/Grandma：Thank you．
Hunter： Grandma ,give me some needles and thread． Little Riding Hood ,Give me some stones．
Grandma： (从桌子上拿来针线)
Little Red Riding Hood：(搬来几个石头)One, two, three.
Hunter： (把小石头装进Wolf的衣服里)
Grandma： I'll thread it.
Hunter： (拿起枪)Woke up!
Wolf：(起床，两手托着大肚子)My stomach is so heavy.
Hunter： You big bad wolf, raise your arms!
Wolf：(边跑边说) Help! Don’t shot me!
Hunter： （开枪）Bang, bang!
Wolf： (应声倒下)
Hunter： The bad wolf is dead．
Little Red Riding Hood和Grandma：Yeah! Thank you．
Little Red Riding Hood、Grandma、Hunter（一起鞠躬）: Thank you
英语短剧：The Fox and the Tiger（狐假虎威）
T---Tiger F---Fox R---Rabbit B---Bird Fr---Frog B----Bear
Tiger: I’m a great tiger. I’m very strong. I’m very brave. I’m the king of the forest.But now I’m very hungry. I must find sth. to eat at once, or I’ll die immediately. Oh, there’s nothing here. And here is nothing, either. Oh, I want to have a rest. (Sleep soundly)
Fox: I’m a fox. You can see, I’m pretty and lovely. I’m good at cheating 0and telling lies. Just now I cheated a crew out of a piece of meat. Mm, Mm, Mm. How delicious it is!
Tiger: Ah, a fox. A good meal. Ah, a good meal.
Fox: Oh, my God! What should I do? Yes, I have a good idea. Yes, a good idea. Hello! Tiger sister! How are you?
Tiger: Not so good. I’m very hungry now. I want to eat you.
Fox: Oh, my dear! How dare you say that! I’m the king of the forest! I’m the king of the forest! If you want to eat me, I will let you die right now.
Tiger: She is the king. She is cheating me. I can’t belive her. I’m the king of the forest here.
Fox: If you don’t believe me, just follow me and see who is the king of the forest.
Tiger: Ok. Let’s go.
Rabbit: I’m a rabbit. I like to eat a turnip. Ah, a big turnip. Oh! It’s too hard. I can’t pull it out.
Bird: I’m a bird.
Rabbit: Hi!
Bird: Hi! What are doing here, Miss Rabbit? Can I help you?
Rabbit: Yes, please.
Frog: I’m a frog. Hello! What are you doing here? What can I do for you?
R&B: Yes, come on!
Frog : Ok! I’m coming!
Bear: I’m a big brown bear. Hello, everyone! What are you doing here?
R,B&F: Come on! Come on! Mr. Bear! You are so strong. Please come here. There is a big turnip. We are all puling it out. Please come and help us.
Bear: Ok! I’m coming.
Fox: Hello, Bear!
Bear: Hi, Fox. Oh, a tiger! (run away)
Fox: Hello, Frog!
Frog: Hi, Fox. Oh, a tiger! (run away)
Fox: Hello, Bird!
Bird: Hi, Fox. Oh, a tiger! (run away)
Fox: Hello, Rabbit!
Rabbit: Hi, Fox. Oh, a tiger! (run away)
Fox: Tiger, Now, you see. They are so frightened! They all run away!
Tiger: Yes, you are right. It’s true. I’m very sorry. You are the king of the forest. That’s all right. I will run away. He is the king. He is the king.
Fox: Wa! There is a big turnip. Now, the turnip belongs to me
April Fool's Day
愚人节
(N：讲述故事者；F：愚男；Mum：妈妈；U：丑男；D1：大女儿；D2：小女儿；S：科学家；king国王)
N: Many years ago, on April 1, a body had birth. His father called him "foolman", nobody like him except his mother. How time flies!
许多年以前的四月一日，有个婴孩诞生了，他老爸给他取名为“愚男”，除他妈妈，没人喜欢他。时间过的真快啊！
F: Mum, I'm eithteen years old, so I will leave this family.
妈妈，我十八岁了，我要离开这个家了。
Mum: All right, but please see me at times. This is a bottle of drink, a piece of dry bread. Remember: take good care of yourself, bye!
好的，但要时不时回家看望我哈。这是一瓶酒，一块干面包。记住：要照顾好自己啊。再见了！
N: He came to a forest, and met an ugly man.
他走到一座森林，遇到一个丑八怪的男人。
U: Hello! I'm very hungry and thirsty, could you give me something to drink and eat, please?
你好！我又饿又干，请给我些喝的和吃的，怎么样？
F: Ok, here.
好的。给。
U: Oh, thanks very much! Now, I will go. Oh, this stick is for you, it will bring luck to you. Good luck!
喔，多谢了！好，我要走了。哦，这根手杖给你，会给你带来好运的。一路好运！
N: The foolman reached a restaurant, the boss had two daughters, they found the stick very brightly.
愚男来到一栋餐馆，老板有两个女儿，她们发现那根手杖闪闪发光。
D1: Oh, how beautiful it is! I want it, it's great!!! （上前抓木棒，却被粘在上面） Oh! Dear! I can't leave it! （吃惊地）
喔，好漂亮的手杖啊！我想要，真是太棒了！！！(上前抓木棒，却被粘在上面)啊，老天啊！我放不开它了！(吃惊地)
D2: Sister, what are you doing there? Do you want this stick yourself? No, I will get a part of it! We are parent's daughters, I must get a part of it like you! （走向木棒）
姐姐，你在那做啥啊？你自个儿想要那根手杖？不行，我要有一份！我们都是父母的女儿，我必须跟你一样要有一分！（走向木棒）
D1: Don't come! Don't come! It's dangerous!
别来！别来！危险！
D2: You can come, so I can come, too! （也被粘在木棒上） Oh, my god! What's wrong with me?
你来得，我也来得！（也被粘在木棒上）啊，老天啊！我怎么啦？
D1: What a pity!
真可惜！
N: Foolman didn't mind at all, after the meal he took the stick leave the restaurant. Of course, two girls followed him. In the field they met an old scientist.
愚男一点都不在意，吃了饭之后，他拿起那根手杖就离开了饭馆。当然，那两个女孩就跟着他。来到一块田的时候，他们遇到一位科学家。
S: Oh! Terrible! You two girls follow a boy. How silly of you! I will take you back home, and take the boy to the police station. （抓stick ,也被粘住） Oh! Bad luck! Terrible!
啊！太可怕了！你姐妹俩跟着一个男孩，你们怎么这么傻啊！我带你们回家，把这个男孩送到警察局去。（抓手杖 ,也被粘住）啊！糟糕！太糟糕啦！
N: A few days later, they got to a strange country. The king had a daughter, but she never smiled or laughed.
几天之后，他们来到一个陌生的国度。国王有个女儿，但她从来不笑。
King: Who can make her smile or laugh, she'll be his wife.
要是谁能让她笑，那她就是他的妻子。
F: Let me try , Perhaps I can.
我来看看。或许我能呢。
N: Then they went to see her. She saw foolman and his friends laughed and laughed.
这样他们就去看望她。她看到愚男和他的朋友就笑个不停。
k: Ok, you make her laugh, now let us look at your 生辰八字. Which day is your birthday?
好的，你让她笑了，现在让我们看看你的生辰八字，你哪天出生的？
F: April 1.
四月一日。
K: Oh! What a great boy! Do you know my country's name? Let me tell you: it called "Fool World"! Very suits you, right?!
哦！多么棒的孩子！你知道我们国家的名字吗？我告诉你吧，叫“愚蠢世界”。非常适合你，对不？
N: The result is ——The foolman lived happily with his wife until they died. That is why we now have a holiday called : "April Fool".
结果是愚男跟他妻子一起幸福的过了一辈子直到死。这就是我们有这样的一个假日的缘由：“愚人节”。
『伍』 英语4人搞笑小话剧
焦仲卿johnny(jforshort)
刘兰芝lunch(lforshort)
焦母johnny’s mother(jmforshort)
刘母lunch’s mother(lmforshort)
太守之子mayor’sson(msforshort)
强盗burglars(abandc)
prologue 序幕
(j作被打状跑上台,内砸出一卷纸筒,j被打中,狼狈不堪)
j:everybody says that i’m hen pecked, but in fact,i’m a strong tiger,(小声)while my
wife is wusong.
译：人人都说我怕老婆，实际上我是老虎，（小声）我妻子是武松。
(指着上台处的门大声道)i’m not afraid of you!
译：我才不怕你呢！
(内砸出一脸盆,j接住当成盾牌护着头)then, i’m afraid of whom! my wife lunchi is the most famous woman in the neighbor-hood.she is braver than me,smarter than me and stronger than me .all this i donot care. i only want she to be tender than me. but she is not! having a wife like this is just like living in the hell!
译：谁怕谁啊！在邻里中，我妻子是最有名气的。她比我勇敢、比我聪明、比我强壮。我也不在乎这些。我只觉得她该对我温柔些，但是她却不懂温柔！有这样的太太就像活在地狱中啊！
(内又砸出一卷纸筒,击中j)
my god! who can help me?(下)
译：我的天！谁来救救我啊？
act1 第一幕
(序幕结束时,jm作窃听状)
jm(拄拐棍上):i can!
(对门内)lunch! lunch! where are you?
l(扎着围裙,拿着锅铲,从门内跳出来):i’m here! what’s up ，mum?
jm:i have told you again and again that you should call me “my most beautiful graceful and dearest mother in law”.
l:ok.my most beautiful graceful and dearest mother-in-law, what’s up?
jm:since you married my son you have be havedso badly.you have been so rude, so brusque,so
lazy……
l:but……
jm:never interrupt me!
l:never interrupt me! since i married your son, that terrible johnny,i have been working hard all
daylong,cooking and washing. i have raised tens of thousands of pigs and cks and chicken
and……
jm:but all those you have done arenot asvaluable as a grandson!
l(生气地挥动着锅铲):oh,you want a grandson,don’t you?(开始解围裙)go and ask your son. i’m leaving!(扯下围裙,扔在jm的脸上,下)
act2
(lm坐在台上打毛线,l拿着锅铲上)
l:mum, i’m back!
lm:you are back?why?what happened?
l:i was kicked out by my most beautiful graceful and dearest mother–in-law.
lm(惊讶,但随即露出幸灾乐祸的神情):see! i have already told you! when you insisted on
marrying that terrible johnny, i told you that he is ugly tupid and poor, but you did not listen
to me. look at yourself……
l:but,mum……
lm:never interrupt me!
l:mum,i’m not interrupting you. i just want to tell you that you are always right ok? and
i’ll marry whomever you want me to.
lm(大喜):nice girl! just now, i met the mayor’s son in the market.he said:“if your daughter
haven’t been married,i really really want to marry her!”now you are free again, i ’ll go
and tell him.(下)
l(惊愕):what? the mayor’s son?the most famous playboy in the neighbor-hood? (手中的锅
铲掉在地上)what a silly thing i have done!(下)
act3
(j睡眼惺忪上)
j(边走边道):lunch! lunch! where are mysocks?
(走了几步,在地上捡起袜子)here they are!(闻一下) er! how smelly! they are still dirty!
(突然想起)lunch has gone! i have to wash them myself.
(他的肚子似乎咕咕叫了起来)oh,i’m so hungry! but there’s no breakfast!(捡起地上的围
裙)this is what lunch always wears! i miss her so much, and her excellent cooking skill! now
she has gone.i have to cook for my mother and myself.
jm(上):where’s my breakfast? where’slunch?hasn’t she got up yet?
j:mum, can’t you remember?lunch has gone!
jm(沉吟片刻):well, to tell you the truth johnny, a son without a wife is suseless. lunch is an ice
girl,go and take her back!
j(立正敬礼):yes madam!
act4
(j开心地走着，忽然跳出来三个强盗)
a:hey you!stop and listen to us!
the road is built by me!(抬脚重重地踩在一块大石头上)
b:and i planted one tree!(亦抬脚踩在同一块石头上)
c:if you want to go by this street---(欲踩石头，但踩到了a的脚)
ab&c:give us all your money!
j(搜遍了每一个口袋，掏出1角硬币):is 1mao enough?
(三强盗晕倒状，接着三人聚在一边商量)
a:what bad luck! this guy is broken!
b:if we cannot robany money today,we will havenot thing to eat tonight!
c:i heard that the mayor’s son is going to marry miss liulan next month.we can go and
rob the wedding!
a&b:good idea!
j(惊讶):what? what? lunch is going to get married? it’s impossible!
ab&c:why? a pretty girl and a richman,what a good couple!
j:but lunch is my wife! we haven’t got divorced yet!
(突然有了主意)i’ve got an idea!you are going to rob the wedding, don’tyou? i’ll go
with you. you take the money and i take the bride.
b:have you got any experience?
j:no. but i’ve got this!(j脱下鞋子从里面摸出一张支票，上书＄1，000，000)
act5
(转眼已到了婚礼之期．ms意气风发用红绸牵着新娘上，j盖着红盖头极不情愿地被拉上台)
(j和三强盗跃至台中)
abc&j:hey you! stop and listen to us!
a:the road is built by me!
b:and i planted one tree.
c:if you want to go by this street---
j:give us all your money!
(l听到j的声音，掀起了盖头)
l(惊喜万分):johnny!(不顾一切地飞奔到j的身边并躲到了的身后)
(ms大怒，挥拳向j打来．j矮身一躲，ms打中了j身后的l，l晕倒)
j(火冒三丈):how dare you beat my wife!（挥拳向ms冲去）
(j与ms混战，jm上，以拐杖击晕ms)
(j将ms胸前的新郎标志扯下戴在自己胸前)
j(扶起l，关切地问):honey, how are you?
l(哭状):i hurt a lot!
j:don’t cry baby.i’ll go and fetch the medicine. (下)
l(起身去追):wait for me! (跑下)
美国情景剧《成长的烦恼》，有空可以到普特英语网下载，www.putclub.com
人物：Tom，Jack 和 forune teller！
镜头一:
Jack：Tom，who do you think the man with a yellow straw hat on the stool in front of the palm trees？
Tom：I guess he must be a fortune teller.
Jack：Are you sure?
Tom：Yes,without a doubt. You see he is looking forward to talking to someone.
Jack：Maybe you are right. But Tom, can you read the palm?
Tom：Yes, I have read a lot of books about reading the palm.May I read your palm?
Jack: Yes,I’d love to. But I want to make fun of him.It is very funny.
镜头二:
(They pass through the sidewalk and walk to the fortune teller)
这个时候，Tom马上变换角色,去扮演算命师傅.对白精彩在这了.
Jack: Hi, my name is Jacke? Would you please read my palm?
Fortune teller: Yes,welcome to here. Sit down please. Give me your left hand.
Jack:But.I had a bad car accident last year.I lost my left arm. Nowadays , I do everything with my right hand. Life with one arm is very difficult.
Fortune teller: Are you kidding me?
Jack: No. I am serious. I hope you guess what I want to know.
Fortune teller: Now,please give your right hand. Let me see…..You must be between jobs. Your wish is to become a millionaire. But You do not know what to do.Let me tell you.
Jack:You are wrong. I am not poor. Though I am not a
million, I have a company, a flat,a car and 80,000 dollars.
Fortune teller: Oh, I know. Your girlfriend must have left you. You have lots of shortcomings. Maybe you don’t make the bed. Maybe you don’t clean the dishes. Maybe you are always in a bad mood. You must be as stubborn as a mule. If I were you, I would make a apology to her at first.
Jack: No,many girls like me. I have you guess the last chance.If you are wrong again, I won’t pay you money.
Fortune teller:You are up to monkey business.If I knew it, I would not read your palm.
Jack: You are right. You guess the answer is right.But it was too late.I hope you guess if I can pay you money.
2--Do you know much about computers?
--Not a great deal.
--I've just been reading an article about them.
They are used for all sorts of things now.
--For accounting systems and things you mean?
--Yes, but they're used for other things too. Do
you remember when we went to buy our tickets for
the flight to Greece?
--Yes.
--The man asked where we wanted to go, then he
typed out the information on a form and waited
for a reply. A few moments later he gave us our
tickets.
--Of course. His machine must have been connected
to a computer.
--That's right.
3关于不同爱好的对话.
Michael: hi, Charles, how are you?
Charles: fine. Thanks. You look great.
Michael: thank you. You know what? I took tennis classes recently and I find myself so crazy about it. I feel so energetic after playing tennis. Do you play tennis?
Charles: No. I don’t. I play football. Tennis is not as exciting as football.
Michael: Charlie, I am afraid I can’t agree with you at this point. It is much easier to find one tennis partner rather than finding a whole bunch of people to play football.
Charlie: well, don’t you think more people are more exciting? Playing tennis is like playing a ping pong game. Just playing back and forth. It’s a kind of boring.
Michael: Noooooooo! When you play tennis, you can keep fit and you don’t get hurt. There is too much body contact in playing football. I don’t want to be pushed, be stepped, be knocked down or……
Charles: that’s the best part of the game.
Michael: Sorry. I can’t talk to you now. I have to go to my tennis club now. My partner is waiting for me there.
Charles: ok. I have to call my buddies about our football match this afternoon. Bye!
Michael: bye!
4纯属原创，大家都是过来人，知道你的难处。还望笑纳。
(最后有点搞笑的成分)
人物：Rose, I(named Jack).
Rose: Hi, Jack.
Jack: Hi, Rose.
Rose: Long time no see, how are you doing?
Jack: I'm doing terribly bad. And how about you?
Rose: I'm fine, thank you. But you, what's up?
Jack: I just cannot find a agreeable job. The salary offered by those companies are really too low. I've had interview several companies, and they all felt satified to my performance, but when
hearing my salary request, they all could not offer.
Rose: Almost the same with my situation. The current job market is so stagnant. I'd have to adapt myself to the reality.
Jack: I cannot agree with you more. But you know, the salary they offered could even hardly afford my daily consumption.I just feel that's gotdamn crazy.
Rose: Hey, Jack, come on. Do you know the current situation of job market? There will be nearly 5 million college graates nationwide, inclusive of a lot of masters. For my own sake, I gave up my baseline at last. Today, I've just signed a job contract with XX(公司名).
Jack: You're really appreciated to remind me. I gotta find a job as soon as possible even with a pretty low salary.
Rose: Cheer up, Jack. I don't think it matters to start with a low salary. You know, gold will shine everywhere. I believe you can get a decent job within 3 years as long as you're hard enough.
Jack: Thank you very much for your encouragement. Let us make a brilliant future hand in hand...
Rose: Hey，Jack. Don这有英语对话，你自己看!http://bookmark.hexun.com/weixiang1015/detailframe.aspx?bid=1435032
't touch me...
『陆』 求5分钟内的4人（男）搞笑英语短话剧
4人话剧 演员: P: Pirate-Grandson. M: Mother. F: Father. K: King -Grandpa. 旁白: There are 4 members in a family, Pirate, a 7-year-old naughty boy. His mummy is a beautiful white-collar worker. His dad, Andy Lau is a famous singer, and his dear grandpa, King is a kindly old man. Pirate loves his grandpa most, because King is very spoiling him. He hates his parents. Frankly speaking, he is afraid of them, Because they are very strict with him. . 正剧：(P,K出场) P: Old King, Open the TV, I want to see Tom and Jerry. I love that mouse. Quick! No time! I can’t wait another second. K: Oh dear! I nearly forget it. Don’t worry, I open it right now. (作开电视状) P: Ha Ha! It’s really funny! Tom is so good! (作高兴状) Oh no! “The End!” Where is Tom? I hate the end! (摔电视机，作极度气愤状) Old King!? (对K吼) K：Oh, what a pity dog! (作左顾右盼状) Your parents are not here ,and we can change another one ,our brave Pirate, just tell me. I’m sure your demand will be satisfied. (作充满自信状) P：Really! OK! Now, let’s watch Caribbean Pirates! K: Humm, No, it’s unfit for you…… (作犹豫状) P: I just like this film, Old King, you tell lies. You don’t keep your promise.（作气愤欲泣状） K; Oh yes, I play it for you. (作为难状) But please be quite, I’m afraid your parents wound not like us doing these. P: Don’t tell so much! I have been an alt man of 7 years old. I promise it to you. (作自豪自信状) K：OK. (作舒心，安慰状) P: Fight him, kill him. Throw these bad guys into the sea…… (高声喊) K: Xu …….. (作禁声状). Remember your promise, young alt man. P: Oh? What promise? I have forgotten it. (作天经地义状) K: Oh?! You are right（作理解状，因为Pirate一贯如此，出尔反尔） P: Old King. I give you an honorable mission. (作自豪状) Be my horse, and I will ride on your back , let’s help these people in dangerous situation, just like a brave knight.(作勇敢状) K: What! Ride on my back! Be your horse!!(作惊异状) P: Yes, your hearing is very good, any question? (作若无其事状) K: No, No, sound a good idea! Very good! You are a brave Pirate. Now come on my back. (作无奈状) P: (作高兴状，作跃上马背状) Hei! Let’s go! Kill all those bad men. Quick! Run quick! ....... (意气风发状) （M,F携手进场）: P: Oh, my god! Mummy, Daddy! (A,D作慌忙状，挡在电视机前) M: Dad, what are you doing!? Naughty Pirate, isn’t your trick!? (作气愤状) P:（作阳痿状） Mummy, it’s not my fault. Old king let me massage his back. Hei Hei (作心虚状，以掩饰内心的恐惧) M: I don’t believe it. (作严肃状) Dad, isn’t really that? (询问K) K: Yes, of course, I can’t image a child only 5 year old, can massage so good. Oh……. (释然状，因为圆了我的谎) M: Really. I don’t believe the litter pirate can massage, who taught him. (作怀疑状) Dear, isn’t you ? F: No, I haven’t, but I decide to enjoy his massage another day, Do you think so, dear? M: Yes, really a good suggestion. （P，D作惊恐状。A：发抖，D：挥汗) （P挡着电视怕被M、F发现，K也为P作掩饰） P: Mummy, Do you feel a little cold? K: Yes, I can feel it. (边挥汗边说冷) M: No, it’s summer. Really hot, do you catch cold? P: No, No, just my feeling. (更加发抖，一不小心被B看到了电视) M: Pirate, what’s behind you? (疑问状) P: Oh, nothing, nothing! (作惊恐状) M: Move away .little Pirate! (作气愤状) P: Oh no! The storm will come. (捂脸作害怕状) M: Caribbean Pirate! What’s a bad film! Little Pirate!? (气愤状) P: Mummy, I surrender. (作投降状) M: Daddy ,this film is unfit for him , it is full of killing，force and negative passion, and it will let him become bad ! K: I know that, but I meat to let him watch Tom and Jerry and he like it very much. Yes? Pirate? (想转移话题与Pirate站在同一战线) P: Yes, a very clever mouse and a stupid cat. (作博学状) M: Dad, don’t let him watch so much TV, it wastes a lot of time, and it is bad for his eyesight. He may become short-sighted. (诚恳状)
希望点赞
『柒』 4人 六分钟 英语幽默短剧(带中文翻译)
公园记（四人课堂话剧）
A(衣衫褴褛） B（衣着光鲜） C小花 E椅子 F新闻记者
B坐在E上吃东西，A一乞丐上前。
A：先生，先生，请给我些面包，谢谢，我饿得不行了。
B：（厌恶）让开，让开。（然后便起身离开，这时他的钱包掉到E上头了） A：先生，先生。（A看见后，立即拾起，追上了走远的B）
B：让开，让开啊，我没吃的了，也没钱了。（看也不看A，仍自顾自地走了） C：他真愚蠢啊
A：可„„先生„„您听我说„„（仍拉着B衣服的后摆）
B：挖，你这人怎么这么讨厌！（还是没有回头看A一眼）
C：椅子啊，你会不会觉得刚刚坐在你身上的人特愚蠢？
E：唉，人总是这么愚蠢啊~~~~
与此同时A与B还在纠缠，这时E终于隐忍不住爆发了。
E：先生！你的钱包丢了！你怎么这么傻啊。
A与B同时回头，看见了那会说话的椅子E，吓昏过去了。这一幕恰巧被经过的F看见了。于是F就报道了这一事件。
F：大家好，我是新闻记者F，今天我看见了一个奇异的现象，一个椅子说话了，两个人被吓昏了，下面我将采访一下被吓昏的两个人。
B：哦，上帝，哦，妈妈。
F：这个人傻了，我们不鸟他了，下面我采访一下另一个人吧，请问你为什么不告诉他，他的钱包丢了？
A：对不起，我不知道“钱包”这个单词怎么讲„„
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F：通过这一事件，我们可以认识到，掌握一门外语的重要性，以及金钱给人类带来的影响。是吗，椅子？
E：是啊，是啊。（E傻傻地拼命点头）
C：唉，人可真愚蠢，椅子也被他们弄傻了。
A:Sir,sir,please give me a piece of bread.thank you,sir.I'm hungry to die.
B:Get away,get away,dirty man.
A:Sir,sir!!
B:Run away,please run away.I have no food,and I don't have money,eitherC:Hey,xiao D,he is so foolish,isn't he?
A:But....sir....please listen to me.....
B:Wa,why are you so disgusting!!
C:Hey,chair,do you feel the man sat on you a moment ago is very stupid.E:Ai,pretty flower,do you know,men are always very silly.
E:Sir!you lost your wallet!Can't you be more clever?
F:Good morning,everybody.I'm a jonrnist F. Today I saw a very weird thing--a chair open her mouth,and two men are frightened to faint. Now,I will intenview the two nozzy man.
B:Wo,my god,wo,my,mum.
F:I'm sorry to tell you this man has been mad.We needn't take notice of him.Let me interview the other man,Hello,man,can you tell men why didn't you tell him he lost his wallet?
A:I'm sorry,I don't know how to speak "钱包" in english......
F:Dear audience,through this thing we can learn that how improtant it is to mastery a foreign language,and how lagre the money affect us. Is that all right,chair?
E:Yes,yes.
C:Ai,men is so silly.