赵本山卖担架小品高清
赵本山 范伟 高秀敏《卖车》
2. 赵本山2005年的春晚小品《卖担架》,是不是又从新拍过啊,仔细看,有些细节都不一样,谁能给我个解释啊
不是重新拍过,是他在辽宁台春晚的,和中央电视台春晚的,各表演一次!所以你会看到两个版本~!后期的央视有个规定,就是在地方台表演过的小品,不许再拿央视春晚表演。
朋友,为了你这个问题我特意去查了一下,我上面说的问题,在2005年已经实施了,05年央视春晚赵本山的小品叫《功夫》(就是你说的《卖担架》),而在同年辽宁春晚,小品名叫《出名》,是完全不同的两个小品。至于你说细节不一样,我想老赵不至于拿央视春晚的小品平时演了又演,细节不一样,是不是春晚过后,对同一个小品拍摄位置不同、制作人不同、发行视频的人不同,有可能同样的小品,背景都一样,而看起来有差别。
3. 求画质清晰的下载[赵本山]卖担架_hd种子的网址好人一生平安
[赵本山]卖担架_hd种子下载地址:
4. 赵本山的'春晚”系列小品 卖拐、卖车、卖担架,以及修车摊,生财有刀—在附近路面上撒钉子
....赵老师把自己当坏人,演绎的人世间生活的种种种种,很生动形象,贴近生活不是吗?呵呵,虽然都是好多年前的【卖拐什么的】但是都家喻户晓,让大家看清生活,呵呵...最爱赵大叔!!
5. 关于赵本山老师卖拐系列小品
<<功夫>>
赵本山: 听说他,不当厨师改防忽悠热线了,竟敢扬言再不上当受骗了,残酷的现实以直逼我心理防线了,今年我要不卖他点儿啥,承诺三年的话题我就没法跟观众兑现了!
蔡维利: 师傅,咱进去吧。
赵本山: 别着急,先拨个骚扰电话!
范伟: 您好,这里是见你,见你,一眼会一眼防忽悠咨询热线,我是资深上当者老范,凭借多年上当经验,对你是否被忽悠了做出明确判断。~~~有人卖拐请按1,有人卖车请按2,有人出脑筋急转弯儿请按3,有人卖担架直接拨110!
赵本山: 你好!
范伟: 你好!
赵本山: 请问您是范师傅吧?
范伟: 啊~你是哪位?
赵本山: 我是~~~有一个问题想直接咨询你老一下。
范伟: 啊,你说!
赵本山: 我们家有头老母猪啊,黑地儿白花的,早晨起来打开圈门以每小时80迈的速度向前疯跑,咣当撞树上死了!
范伟: 撞死了?这个猪的视力是不是有什么问题啊?
赵本山: 俩眼睛都是1.5的!
范伟: 会不会有什么心理疾病啊?
赵本山: 心理可健康了呢!
范伟: 那怎么会撞死呢?
赵本山: 因为那头猪不会脑筋急转弯呗!
范伟: 我说你这个人不讲究啊,你不按套路出牌啊,出脑筋急转弯你得按3啊。既然这样的话我也咨询个问题!
赵本山: 你说!
范伟: 过年了,我们家什么年货也没买,就剩下一头猪和一头驴,你说我是先杀猪呢,还是先杀驴呢?
赵本山: 那你先杀~~给你们俩个机会!
蔡维利: 驴肉好吃!先杀驴!
赵本山: 先杀驴!
范伟: 恭喜你答对啦,猪也是这么想的! ~~~小样儿,~~~~哼!
赵本山: 悲哀,真让我替你感到悲哀,眼看就要独闯江湖了,这怎么能让我放心的下?
王晓虎: 师傅,先杀猪好了!
赵本山: 那驴也是这么想的!我告诉你,就这个问题你先杀谁都不好使!我为什么没回答呢,就因为我考虑他是有问题的!~~诶呀,看到没? 他已经从当年的一根颈,现在成长到两头犊了!
蔡维利: 师傅,他太厉害了,我看咱回去吧!
赵本山: 不行,卖拐把他忽悠瘸了,卖车把他忽悠嗫了,在10分钟之内不把他摆平,我就没法跟你俩当教师爷了!
蔡维利、王晓虎:师傅领进门,忽悠在个人!
赵本山: 好,看我的眼色行事,进去! 美了他了,看看,呀哈,还跑了,往哪跑!
蔡维利: 请问范厨师在吗?
范伟: 诶,哪位?你们咨询~~~诶呀 诶呀 诶呀呀呀呀呀呀呀呀呀,这是什么造型啊,挺别致啊,非常六加七啊,这当年叱咤风云的大忽悠,怎么落到这步田地了,苍天啊,大地啊,这是哪位天使大姐替我出的这口气啊。猪撞树上了,你撞猪上了吧,追尾是不是啊!咋又改3了呢?
赵本山: 三年了,我都想死你了!
范伟: 忽悠!
赵本山: 我是向你忏悔来了!
范伟: 接着忽悠!
赵本山: 有我徒弟做证!
蔡维利、王晓虎: 恩!
范伟: 组团忽悠我来了啊,不好使了大忽悠,只要我们这些善良的人对你提高警惕,你还会什么?啊?不就会几个脑筋急转弯吗!地上1个猴,树上7个猴,既是两个猴,又是8个猴!
赵本山: 也可能三个猴,还可能9个猴!
范伟: 怎么又变了呢?
赵本山: 怀孕一个猴!
范伟: 有意思吗?
赵本山: 没意思,我不是给你出脑筋急转弯那个初级阶段了,我是向你赔礼道歉来了!三年了,在这个世界上最对不起的人就是范厨师,多么好的人,我常跟你们说,你说我忽悠他干啥?多么忠厚老实!你打我两下,你下不去手,你骂我两句,你张不开嘴,这样,反正你原谅我也来了,不原谅我也来了,原谅不原谅我都带着诚意铺面而来地!
范伟: 呀呀呀呀呀呀,还铺面呢!
赵本山: 把我搀起!
范伟: 呀 呀 能站起来啊 没啥病啊 诶呀呀呀呀 走两步 走两步 诶诶诶诶 讹人是不是? 大伙都看着呢啊,出现什么意外跟我没关系啊!你老整这个悬的愣干啥,你赶紧站起来啊!有什么事你赶紧说好不好?
赵本山: 你想听吗?
范伟: 我想听!
赵本山: 听完你信吗?
范伟: 你只要站起来我就信!
赵本山: 你撤吧,我能站起来!
范伟: 说啊!
赵本山: 说来话长啊,记得那是2003年的第一场雪,比2002年来的稍晚一些!
范伟: 你整歌词干啥啊!有什么话,直接说!
赵本山: 我不跟你玩虚的了,今天我就向你道歉来了,上货! 眼熟吗?
范伟: 这就是你忽悠我那几百块钱?
赵本山: 分文没动!
范伟: 这是那块表?
赵本山: 带在我手上就没走过字!
范伟: 大哥!!~~
赵本山: 我们俩的恩怨应该了结了吧,还有它,这几年耽误我们俩之间感情的就是这个罪魁祸首轮椅,今天我必须当这你的面把它砸碎!
王晓虎: 师傅不能砸啊!
蔡维利: 师傅这轮椅是你老哥俩重归于好的见证啊!
赵本山: 不要乱说, 我 , 你不能拦我!
范伟: 大哥,要砸你就砸我吧,大哥你太有诚意了,孩子们说的对!它不仅是我们重归于好的见证,还是我以后避免上当的警钟,我收藏了!
赵本山: 不行,孩子们花钱给我做的你怎么能收藏呢?
范伟: 花多少钱我给啊!
赵本山: 花多少钱啊?
蔡维利: 两千!
范伟: 我出两千!
赵本山: 我给两千五!
范伟: 我三千!
赵本山: 我三千五!
范伟: 我四千!
赵本山: 我五千!
范伟: 成交!
赵本山: 给范厨师装上。
范伟: 你喊的五千,我落得锤,成交!
赵本山: 不对!你记错了,怎么喊的?
蔡维利: 我听是范厨师喊的啊!
王晓虎: 不对!是师傅喊的!
范伟: 你看看!
赵本山: 乱了,乱了啊!这样啊,谁喊的不要紧!你看咱们缕一缕啊,谁先喊的?
范伟: 我先喊的!
赵本山: 你喊多少?
范伟: 我两千!
赵本山: 我2500!
范伟: 3000!
赵本山: 3500!
范伟: 4000!
赵本山: 4500!
范伟: 5000!
赵本山: 你看看!
范伟: 不对,我自己缕一缕啊!
赵本山: 那你自己乱了!
范伟: 你别说,2000 2500 3000 3500 4000 4500 5000!
赵本山: 对啊!
范伟: 诶呀,
王晓虎: 是你喊的!
范伟: 不对,不对啊大哥,我喊的4000,你直接喊的5000对不对? 对不对?
观众: 对!!~~~~~~~~~~
赵本山: 这样啊,乱了啊,既然咱哥俩呢,你同意收藏,咱们重喊一次,听明白这5000到底是谁喊的?那个!~~起价多少?
蔡维利: 2000!
范伟: 我2000!
赵本山: 成交! 这回不乱了!
范伟: 不是,你不往上叫了啊?
赵本山: 对,我怕喊乱了!
范伟: 啊! 别动啊,这轮椅是我的了!
赵本山: 我跟你说老弟,按理来说不应该跟你要钱,你还死要面子,你应该管人要,但是~~
范伟: 但是给你我就上当了!
赵本山: 我跟你说,刚开始我就没想~~
范伟: 诶 诶 诶 改抢了是不是?
赵本山: 你理解错了!
范伟: 你别装了,从你一进屋,你分别用了苦肉计,欲擒故纵计,师徒配合砸车计,稀里糊涂突然落锤计,我只用了一计!
赵本山: 将计就计!
范伟: 送你一计!
赵本山: 走为上计!
范伟: 不送!
赵本山: 失败了,知道因为啥失败吗?他一个厨师不看菜谱看起兵法了,撤!
蔡维利、王晓虎:师傅!!!~~~~~~~~~
赵本山: 干啥玩意儿啊,跪哪去了,我在这呢!
王晓虎: 师傅,太对不起了,你那忽悠智商太底了,跟你也学不着啥玩意儿!
蔡维利: 你该干啥就赶紧走吧,一会都赶不上二路汽车了都!
赵本山: 悲哀!
蔡维利、王晓虎: 师傅在上,受徒儿一拜!
赵本山: 诶呀吗呀,呀呀呀呀!这个世界太疯狂了,耗子都给猫当伴娘了!我的妈呀!
蔡维利、王晓虎: 师傅,请收下我们吧!
范伟: 诶 诶 诶 孩子们,忽海无涯,回头是岸,学好就好啊,过年了给你们包红包去,啊,包红包啊!
赵本山: 这钱你们能要吗?我上个月没给你俩发工资吗?悲哀,的确悲哀啊!
范伟: 来吧,一人一个,拿好啊!
蔡维利、王晓虎: 谢师傅!
蔡维利、王晓虎: 师傅,拿下!
赵本山: 哈哈哈,反间计!
范伟: 诶呀,防不胜防啊!可是大忽悠我不服你啊,你忽悠来忽悠去我做的不还是轮椅吗?
赵本山: 你想要啥?
范伟: 你的承诺呢?你的担架呢?
赵本山: 自己开发!
范伟: 诶!
赵本山: 这就是为你定做的,如果短还可以加长!
范伟: 诶呀,为了我你是煞费苦心啊,多亏我计高一筹,打开红包!
赵本山: 恩?
范伟: 过年啦,送你们一副对联:“拐一年摇一年缘分啊,吃一堑长一智谢谢啊!”
赵本山: 我再给你补个横批吧:“自学成才”!
6. 赵本山的小品《卖拐三部曲》分别出自哪年的春晚
2001年《卖拐》演员:赵本山
范伟
高秀敏
2002年《卖车》演员:赵本山
范伟
高秀敏
2005年《功夫》演员:赵本山
范伟
7. 赵本山演的那个和徒弟一起卖轮椅给范伟的那个小品是啥在哪找台词啊
2005春节晚会小品《功夫》台词(完全精品版)
作者:未知 剧本来源:网络 点击数: 更新时间:2005-11-14
2005春节晚会小品《功夫》(赵本山、范伟、蔡维利、王晓虎)台词:
→珊瑚队长← 说明:任何人不得随意复制或发表,台词仅供模仿小品的人和忠实于赵本山小品的人阅读,对原稿稍有改动,请原谅
赵本山: 听说他,不当厨师改防忽悠热线了,竟感扬言再不上当受骗了,残酷的现实以直逼我心理防线了,今年我要不卖他点儿啥,承诺三年的话题我就没法跟观众兑现了!
蔡维利: 师傅,咱进去吧。
赵本山: 别着急,先拨个骚扰电话!
范伟: 您好,这里是见你,见你,一眼会一眼防忽悠咨询热线,我是自身上当者老范,凭借多年上当经验,对你是否被忽悠了做出明确判断。~~~有人卖拐请按1,有人卖车请按2,有人出脑筋急转弯儿请按3,有人卖担架直接拨110!
赵本山: 你好!
范伟: 你好!
赵本山: 请问您是范师傅吧?
范伟: 啊~你是哪位?
赵本山: 我是~~~有一个问题想直接咨询你老一下。
范伟: 啊,你说!
赵本山: 我们家有头老母猪啊,黑地儿白花的,早晨起来打开圈门以每小时80迈的速度向前疯跑,咣当撞树上死了!
范伟: 撞死了?这个猪的视力是不是有什么问题啊?
赵本山: 俩眼睛都是1.5的!
范伟: 会不会有什么心理疾病啊?
赵本山: 心理可健康了呢!
范伟: 那怎么会撞死呢?
赵本山: 因为那头猪不会脑筋急转弯呗!
范伟: 我说你这个人不讲究啊,你不按套路出牌啊,出脑筋急转弯你得按3啊。既然这样的话我也咨询个问题!
赵本山: 你说!
范伟: 过年了,我们家什么年货也没买,就剩下一头猪和一头驴,你说我是先杀猪呢,还是先杀驴呢?
赵本山: 那你先杀~~给你们俩个机会!
蔡维利: 驴肉好吃!先杀驴!
赵本山: 先杀驴!
范伟: 恭喜你答对啦,猪也是这么想的! ~~~小样儿,~~~~哼!
赵本山: 悲哀,真让我替你感到悲哀,眼看就要独闯江湖了,这怎么能让我放心的下?
王晓虎: 师傅,先杀猪好了!
赵本山: 那驴也是这么想的!我告诉你,就这个问题你先杀谁都不好使!我为什么没回答呢,就因为我考虑他是有问题的!~~诶呀,看到没? 他已经从当年的一根颈,现在成长到两头犊了!
蔡维利: 师傅,他太厉害了,我看咱回去吧!
赵本山: 不行,卖拐把他忽悠瘸了,卖车把他忽悠嗫了,在10分钟之内不把他摆平,我就没法跟你俩当教师爷了!
蔡维利、王晓虎:师傅领进门,忽悠在个人!
赵本山: 好,看我的眼色行事,进去! 美了他了,看看,呀哈,还跑了,往哪跑!
蔡维利: 请问范厨师在吗?
范伟: 诶,哪位?你们咨询~~~诶呀 诶呀 诶呀呀呀呀呀呀呀呀呀,这是什么造型啊,挺别致啊,非常六加七啊,这当年赤叉风云的大忽悠,怎么落到这步天地了,苍天啊,大地啊,这是哪位天使大姐替我出的这口气啊。猪撞树上了,你撞猪上了吧,追尾是不是啊!咋又改3了呢?
赵本山: 三年了,我都想死你了!
范伟: 忽悠!
赵本山: 我是向你忏悔来了!
范伟: 接着忽悠!
赵本山: 有我徒弟做证!
蔡维利、王晓虎: 恩!
范伟: 组团忽悠我来了啊,不好使了大忽悠,只要我们这些善良的人对你提高警惕,你还会什么?啊?不就会几个脑筋急转弯吗!地上1个猴,树上7个猴,既是两个猴,又是8个猴!
赵本山: 也可能三个猴,还可能9个猴!
范伟: 怎么又变了呢?
赵本山: 怀孕一个猴!
范伟: 有意思吗?
赵本山: 没意思,我不是给你出脑筋急转弯那个初级阶段了,我是向你赔礼道歉来了!三年了,在这个世界上最对不起的人就是范厨师,多么好的人,我常跟你们说,你说我忽悠他干啥?多么忠厚老实!你打我两下,你下不去手,你骂我两句,你张不开嘴,这样,反正你原谅我也来了,不原谅我也来了,原谅不原谅我都带着诚意铺面而来地!
范伟: 呀呀呀呀呀呀,还铺面呢!
赵本山: 把我搀起!
范伟: 呀 呀 能站起来啊 没啥病啊 诶呀呀呀呀 走两步 走两步 诶诶诶诶 额人是不是? 大伙都看着呢啊,出现什么意外跟我没关系啊!你老整这个悬的愣干啥,你赶紧站起来啊!有什么事你赶紧说好不好?
赵本山: 你想听吗?
范伟: 我想听!
赵本山: 听完你信吗?
范伟: 你只要站起来我就信!
赵本山: 你撤吧,我能站起来!
范伟: 说啊!
赵本山: 说来话长啊,记得那是2003年的第一场雪,比2002年来的稍晚一些!
范伟: 你整歌词干啥啊!有什么话,直接说!
赵本山: 我不跟你玩虚的了,今天我就向你道歉来了,上货! 眼熟吗?
范伟: 这就是你忽悠我那几百块钱?
赵本山: 分文没动!
范伟: 这是那块表?
赵本山: 带在我手上就没走过字!
范伟: 大哥!!~~
赵本山: 我们俩的恩怨应该了结了吧,还有它,这几年耽误我们俩之间感情的就是这个罪魁祸首轮椅,今天我必须当这你的面把它砸碎!
王晓虎: 师傅不能砸啊!
蔡维利: 师傅这轮椅是你老哥俩重归于好的见证啊!
赵本山: 不要乱说, 我 , 你不能拦我!
范伟: 大哥,要砸你就砸我吧,大哥你太有诚意了,孩子们说的对!它不仅是我们重归于好的见证,还是我以后避免上当的警钟,我收藏了!
赵本山: 不行,孩子们花钱给我做的你怎么能收藏呢?
范伟: 花多少钱我给啊!
赵本山: 花多少钱啊?
蔡维利: 两千!
范伟: 我出两千!
赵本山: 我给两千五!
范伟: 我三千!
赵本山: 我三千五!
范伟: 我四千!
赵本山: 我五千!
范伟: 成交!
赵本山: 给范厨师装上。
范伟: 你喊的五千,我落得锤,成交!
赵本山: 不对!你记错了,怎么喊的?
蔡维利: 我听是范厨师喊的啊!
王晓虎: 不对!是师傅喊的!
范伟: 你看看!
赵本山: 乱了,乱了啊!这样啊,谁喊的不要紧!你看咱们缕一缕啊,谁先喊的?
范伟: 我先喊的!
赵本山: 你喊多少?
范伟: 我两千!
赵本山: 我2500!
范伟: 3000!
赵本山: 3500!
范伟: 4000!
赵本山: 4500!
范伟: 5000!
赵本山: 你看看!
范伟: 不对,我自己缕一缕啊!
赵本山: 那你自己乱了!
范伟: 你别说,2000 2500 3000 3500 4000 4500 5000!
赵本山: 对啊!
范伟: 诶呀,
王晓虎: 我记错了,是师傅喊的!
范伟: 不对,不对啊大哥,我喊的4000,你直接喊的5000对不对? 对不对?
观众: 对!!~~~~~~~~~~
赵本山: 这样啊,乱了啊,既然咱哥俩呢,你同意收藏,咱们重喊一次,听明白这5000到底是谁喊的?那个!~~起价多少?
蔡维利: 2000!
范伟: 我2000!
赵本山: 成交! 这回不乱了!
范伟: 不是,你不往上叫了啊?
赵本山: 对,我怕喊乱了!
范伟: 啊! 别动啊,这轮椅是我的了!
赵本山: 我跟你说老弟,按理来说不应该跟你要钱,你还死要面子,你应该管人要,但是~~
范伟: 但是给你我就上当了!
赵本山: 我跟你说,刚开始我就没想~~
范伟: 诶 诶 诶 改抢了是不是?
赵本山: 你理解错了!
范伟: 你别装了,从你一进屋,你分别用了苦肉计,遇擒故众计,师徒配合砸车计,犀利糊涂突然落锤计,我只用了一计!
赵本山: 将计就计!
范伟: 送你一计!
赵本山: 走为上计!
范伟: 不送!
赵本山: 失败了,知道因为啥失败吗?他一个厨师不看菜谱看起兵法了,撤!
蔡维利、王晓虎:师傅!!!~~~~~~~~~
赵本山: 干啥玩意儿啊,跪哪去了,我在这呢!
王晓虎: 师傅,太对不起了,你那忽悠智商太底了,跟你也学不着啥玩意儿!
蔡维利: 你该干啥就赶紧走吧,一会都赶不上二路汽车了都!
赵本山: 悲哀!
蔡维利、王晓虎: 师傅在上,受徒儿一拜!
赵本山: 诶呀吗呀,呀呀呀呀!这个世界太疯狂了,耗子都给猫当伴娘了!我的妈呀!
蔡维利、王晓虎: 师傅,请收下我们吧!
范伟: 诶 诶 诶 孩子们,书还无涯,回头是岸,学好就好啊,过年了给你们包红包去,啊,包红包啊!
赵本山: 这钱你们能要吗?我上个月没给你俩发工资吗?悲哀,的确悲哀啊!
范伟: 来吧,一人一个,拿好啊!
蔡维利、王晓虎: 谢师傅!
蔡维利、王晓虎: 师傅,拿下!
赵本山: 哈哈哈,反歼计!
范伟: 诶呀,防不胜防啊!可是大忽悠我不服你啊,你忽悠来忽悠去我做的不还是轮椅吗?
赵本山: 你想要啥?
范伟: 你的承诺呢?你的担架呢?
赵本山: 自己开发!
范伟: 诶!
赵本山: 这就是为你定做的,如果短还可以加长!
范伟: 诶呀,为了我你是煞费苦心啊,多亏我计高一筹,打开红包!
赵本山: 恩?
范伟: 过年啦,送你们一副对联:“拐一年摇一年缘分啊,吃一堑长一智谢谢啊!”
赵本山: 我再给你补个横批吧:“自学成才”!
8. 赵本山和范伟大演的一个小品,讲买一个轮椅,赵本上喊一千一千五两千成交。叫啥
这是赵本山卖拐三部曲的第三部《功夫》。
2005春节晚会小品《功夫》,也是赵本山“忽悠三部曲”系列小品的最后一部,前两部《卖拐》、《卖车》中赵本山扮演的忽悠大叔出尽了风头,将骗子刻画得入木三分。
在《功夫》中,范伟终于学会了“憋”,憋住劲儿就是不上当,最后终于战胜了赵本山。这个小品也获得当年春晚语言类节目一等奖。
(8)赵本山卖担架小品高清扩展阅读:
由赵本山出演的《卖拐》、《卖车》以及《功夫》三部小品,披露出社会上形形色色的行骗者的无耻伎俩以及那些受害者的愚昧无知,意在提醒人们对不法分子提高警惕。
其中的第一部显然是影射社会上的一些骗人伎俩,有对此进行揭露的性质,至于接下来第二、三部则就是因为受欢迎而炮制出来的,但依然深受欢迎,第三部《功夫》也是为其画上了一个圆满的句号。
9. 赵本山卖担架 高分悬赏
Zhao Benshan: good New Year everybody! Take a look at what brought us to this new stuff, ah - stretcher! ! Oh, is that last year with crutches modification of the child - to Hong Kong before the land - the whole two hours Nie!
I call the ah --
Stretcher stretcher pillow - wonderful
All travel Home - need to
Cheat big time every year - a fool
As early as a well-off life - came to the
Gao Xiumin: Hush! ~~~~~~ Your child in a low voice - so be careful that large-Bogeng listening!
Zhao Benshan: hear the sounds? Hear the sounds! ! I pointed to the black this year, he sold it!
Gao Xiumin: This unscrupulous business Zaigan of us can limp! Let us have the whole family of De Gouqiang!
Zhao Benshan: to stop? I sell this to a stretcher ah? In addition to his IQ of who can buy ah? Our also have to look for him! Why? I do not have a situation in front of the children! ! !
Gao Xiumin: Yes, ah - that driving a wheelchair in front of them, familiar look good ah! - Oh you do, Bogeng son!
(Fan Wei play)
Zhao Benshan: Oh - kung fu people live, I hope every day, week-week wait, I hope that month, I hope I hope that the stars End of the moon, he can wait until the ah! - Big brother ~~~~~~~ ah!
Fan Wei: ah --
Zhao Benshan: ah --
Fan Wei: Pooh ah ~~~~~~~~~! I have made sworn never again met you, you for giving me the justification to open!
Zhao Benshan: I ignore the partial opening.
Fan Wei: you for giving me the opening arguments.
Zhao Benshan: I ignore the open.
Fan Wei: I Jiuli open.
Zhao Benshan: I ignore the open.
Fan Wei: I Jiuli open.
Gao Xiumin: old man, Li Zanjiu open it! You look at your entire family, they do not want to see that we had!
Fan Wei: Big Brother, I pray you! ! ! I found all the money to you, you have the goods to the children left behind, you'll spare you a life span ~~~~~
Zhao Benshan: big brother, this is what you say ah? Shashi Hou is the map I had the money pinch? Our North-East are the children who Shicheng, the Government giving you my heart the small window of the bright future that lies issued by the Small children for the first time the collision happened, I made a life decision: you will be paying a friend! Big brother ah --
Fan Wei: you need to talk money! Beg limp in with my physical disability has been sorry! --
Gao Xiumin: (whispering) old man, they all agreed to give you the money, you can not make them a limp!
Zhao Benshan: (whispering) to have a few real life opponent? I want the enemy to the soul from the body to carry out a thorough destroy!
Fan Wei: limp you told me that I do not have to save the children?
Zhao Benshan: big brother, because you still have to save ah -! Here children are not outsiders, Zan Geliang children may wish to打开天窗说亮话- you do not find what he found her body strange ah?
Fan Wei: like yesterday, look at the present day, I go - the past two years, the hair on my head more and more sloppy, but more on the chin like bamboo shoots after the rain to the village as a flourish --
Zhao Benshan: Congratulations! - Your IQ have made a full recovery! At the same time, but you are also aware of the existence of the sting you a very serious problem of child organs of movement!
Fan Wei: I have a normal IQ?
Zhao Benshan: restored. I can not believe there were any further on the spot entitled Fast Fun and Games!
Fan Wei: good at the end! But you are not allowed to test a child to have been subject to the al-Mongolian ~~~~~
Gao Xiumin: (whispering) old man, you have to be in the child can Zezheng ah - red on his IQ, not that he also had the title of the play out?
Zhao Benshan: (whispering) limp radical right! (On the Fan Wei), I promise you that I gave you an internationally through the WTO 9000 certified human resources professional competency test at the title small children Fun and Games!
Fan Wei: Good ~ ~ ~ end
Zhao Benshan: ready? Please listen to the title! Q - Bank of the Earth's favorite three words, said what is it?
Fan Wei: (end-_-b) - do not know.
Zhao Benshan: Congratulations - the answer -! ! !
Fan Wei: not so exaggerated, right? I really do not have to think very seriously hey! :) On the correct answers?
Zhao Benshan: This is your IQ to improve the performance of the ah! When tooth engraved with the tooth, you can not understand the people as a doctor in a rescue patients after heart is what wins to lift the spirits of the mind!
Fan Wei: Thank you, really! ! ! Yes, GE ah, you have just suffered what he said I was organs of movement harm children with what's what? You were a child help line has been good since I do not?
Zhao Benshan: what he Era of movement disease? I-mei said ah!
Fan Wei: you just have Mingming Ti ah?
Gao Xiumin: right ah, ah you just did not say yesterday, I have heard!
Zhao Benshan: (whispered) Lao Pozi, so you speak out of turn pinch night? Will be at least two dead ah? I explained to go home with you! Such difficult cases I did not take much to limp and then when they Zhibu Hao Our brand to hit!
Fan Wei: Big Brother! ! ! You can never say that I do not limp behind ah! To help people to help you in the end, my son Xia Bansheng depend on you! ! !
Zhao Benshan: ... ... Well, see you in my friend's sake, I instruct you on the show; but ugly as saying the first floor - a good government Zhibu Hao disease Baozhun I do not, by the time you can I limp complain!
Fan Wei: The old saying goes: to know all words and not just words; big brother, even though you say --
Zhao Benshan: Well, I can say, ah --
Fan Wei: What do you say
Zhao Benshan: Then I can really say, ah --
Fan Wei: What do you say
Zhao Benshan: Then I can really say, ah --
Wei Fan: You said that the fast ah
Oh, well that the pinch -? Terrible ......
Fan Wei: Well, very even - stand!
Zhao Benshan: simply say, you have Meniere's disease known as anthrax spores organs of movement syndrome, was largely put on a child, the prevalence rate for the 10 billionth.
Fan Wei: ~~~~~ even how squeeze always so unlucky? The whole of China on this case on how it is my turn to a pinch? (Trial of strength so that the hammer head)
Gao Xiumin: big brother, you can listen to the limp he had Huyou! He may be - will be the Hu You!
Fan Wei: Do you interrupt limp! I am not playing hide the children still!
Zhao Benshan: You have just discovered - your hair has begun to wonder if God is not a ghost feet to move to your chin, but are not allowed to say after the day of your nose will run all of a sudden your Nao Menzi, Your eye will go to your head on the shoulders!
Fan Wei: Oh you do, then I would have become deformed children of what King Kong? !
Zhao Benshan: But you hold in fear, at any rate you are now the situation is also still early. Thanks to the timely discovery, you also active with the treatment of children, was found two days later may have been a!
Fan Wei: Please do think of a way out - dead horse of the right to live when you Marion!
Zhao Benshan: This full-body organs of the movement disorders e to the location of the body organs of different high and low potential energy arising from differences So, we need to rule the disease is also very simple principle - which is to全身各器官The position is basically the same level.
Fan Wei: I do not have the body has been lying flat?
Zhao Benshan: wow! And medical experts concluded exactly the same! ! ! You have more and smarter!
Fan Wei: But lying at home all day long, and how I can breathe fresh air? I will be the Henmen ah!
Zhao Benshan: tie, you have to go out when others do not have the carrying what!
Fan Wei: carrying bed? Who have to carry that thing moving ah!
Zhao Benshan: not a thing you call a stretcher!
Fan Wei: what stuff? Some even can not remember a time ......
Zhao Benshan: limp anxious, I would like to help you Oh, do you recall memories of other great football players were injured brother lying on the vegetable plots, how they end it?
Fan Wei: After the injury, they seemed to be - even roll kick with child abuse, Pakistani chicken cock Mayan Lei Era ......
Zhao Benshan: After the child allowed to do?
Fan Wei: After the child allowed - to steal feeling the referee Song Qiubo children there and pushing the neck shout mother ......
Gao Xiumin: (whispered) Qiu Shajiao ah?
Zhao Benshan: spinach in the fall of the seedling! (Fan Wei on) and then later allowed to abuse it?
Fan Wei: Bai Dagua and then run up to four children of soldiers Emergency Unit, with a stretcher took him off ......
Zhao Benshan: (interrupting) Governor -! You just said what gadgets to use the lift?
Fan Wei: yes ah? Stretcher ah!
Zhao Benshan: bone outside Germany - when teeth tooth engraved with your progress, I saw a little hi on the United States; my life is the greatest happiness in patients with high-IQ children!
Fan Wei: stretcher, but I do not know how to buy ah!
Zhao Benshan: to buy a stretcher can not see ads!
Fan Wei: It depends on effect?
Zhao Benshan: they are the Road? But big brother ah, you are to be regarded as the purpose of his Waner - I use a year based on the size of your door to the design of a stretcher!
Fan Wei: (how they feel is a hidden Maone?)
Zhao Benshan: You lie down under the two children try!
Fan Wei: Oh - how is feeling the pinch handmade? So also the right length!
Gao Xiumin: (can not help but chipped in) more than it fresh - last year it changed the crutches!
Zhao Benshan: (in a low voice to remind) you get in a word limp!
Fan Wei: Big Brother, the stretcher you sell me! ! How much money, I give you full! ! !
Zhao Benshan: what the money is not money, I tell you Shashi Hou mentioned money? You told me the money again, I do not sell! ! ! !
Fan Wei: Big Brother, you can be absolutely angry limp ah! ...... That this time the stretcher ......?
Zhao Benshan: I count the first two of you to buy a second gift, do not want your money!
Fan Wei: you did not expect not only skillful, so noble medical ethics ah! ...... But I think white people get things may not always mind enthusiasm.
Zhao Benshan: big brother ah, you do not mind to the end? I Buwang you pay such a friend!
Fan Wei: Big Brother, I should have to take more money thanks to you many, but today, out of the provisional Liu Waner, has not brought any more valuable stuff ah!
Zhao Benshan: (at daughter-in-law) What did you say? ? ? To ring what ah - ah what ring?
Gao Xiumin: (Looking at a loss) I have to say that ring-mei ah -!
Zhao Benshan: what? ! You want to mei even ring you say? It is not your niece also want you to help a child Jinong it? ? ? That night you can lose face?
Fan Wei: It does not matter! I'm not an outsider, can shake us is our own people!
Zhao Benshan: big brother ah sorry, I really can not promising young married woman - you want to ring, waiting for me to go back in, she cooked up! Ring so valuable items, big brother or your own good to stay married to a young married woman to use it!
Fan Wei: Big Brother ~~~~~~ limp you can not make a sister-in-law! ! ! A ring is not it? Now, to you - anyway, I washed the physical conditions of this child, is basically in accordance with the law will soon bid farewell to the marriage!
Gao Xiumin: Brother, can you limp when he! This is the harm in him you!
Fan Wei: (high-Hidetoshi) you - this is the harm in me! ! ! The husband and wife do all three - a man how it will be the difference between gap - pinch?
Zhao Benshan: All right, not us outsiders. I have not had the need to give - a stretcher! Ring, I will not see the outside.
Fan Wei: Brother, can you really give up the seats! Now that my IQ has been restored, this wheelchair and I together on the back of you! I went ah! ! ! ! !
Zhao Benshan: After the regular home to play ah!
(Fan Wei stretcher with a left)
Gao Xiumin: (Looking at the backs away) you do not deceive people at home!
Zhao Benshan: looking at you, we thank him have it!
Fan Wei: (back) ~~~~~ Thank you for your big brother ~~~~~~~
Zhao Benshan: never saw? Go Nahao ring home, forgot to limp cart!
Gao Xiumin: Hou account for the wheelchair places, go back and take Yousha Yong ah!
Zhao Benshan: Jia limp, machine-guns and so on to next year, he even has to sell! ! !
Gao Xiumin:-_-b
(END)
10. 谁有赵本山小品全集下载的种子呢
有钱了
卖车
卖拐
相亲
面子
门神
昨天
今天
明天
拜年
钟点工
送水工
出名
说事儿
小草
双簧
心病
如此竞争
功夫
策划
卖梨
牛大叔提干
城市打工妹
老有少心
出名
演员的烦恼
同学会
我想有个家
卖担架